I have inadvertently given myself a case of the artistic “Yips”.
I fear I may have spent too long over the past few weeks gorging myself on the work of the English Illustrator Ronald Searle, this coupled with my own inept attempts at being able to finish a drawing have left me in somewhat of an artistic no man’s land.
The “Yips” as described by the Mayo Clinic are:
“involuntary wrist spasms that occur most commonly when golfers are trying to putt. However, the yips can also affect people who play other sports — such as cricket, darts and baseball. It was once thought that the yips were always associated with performance anxiety.”
Now the last time I looked drawing wasn’t a sport (although curiously along with poetry it was one of the original, modern olympic disciplines) but I can certainly identify with the performance anxiety bit.
Whilst 99.9999999% of the interwebs’ population don’t care that I am colour blind, unfortunately I do and this has always led me to believe that my artistic endeavours should be limited to half finished, unfunny doodles in countless unfilled notebooks (Huzzahh! So far so good, I have achieved this bit) However, this has also fuelled what I like to term as Analysis Paralysis. I get myself locked into a mental spiral of over analysing the task at hand whilst never actually completing it. This can satisfy my inner demons that it will never be good enough so whats the point in finishing it or I can spend an eternity looking at the task and being afraid to commit to it.
My line drawing of a Hare is the point in question. I finally picked up the courage to draw something (using the grid method to eliminate some of my fears) but none the less I drew it. I quite like it. In fact that’s the problem. The challenge I set myself was to paint a watercolour picture using a very limited colour palette (preferably one colour) but I can’t bring myself to use this drawing as the basis for my painting. All I can see is myself spoiling a half decent line drawing with a watercolour that looks like it’s been painted by an Labrador.
I suppose I am going to have to subscribe to the theory that the first 10,000 drawings are the worst and that the sooner I get them over and done with the sooner I can move on. I shouldn’t be so attached to the drawing, I should develop my confidence, tell myself my next drawing is my best drawing, stop reading the internet and do something original.
I really have no idea whether I will ever finish this painting project or whether I will just file it away with all my other procrastinations. Which reminds me, I must alphabetise my box of procrastinations!!