A Challenge to The Bard of Barnsley

To be The Bard of Barnsley
is an insult from me to thee,
to talk like Graham Chapman
in that sketch by Monty Python
is to pander to their proletariat needs;
layabouts loathe language
and it’s your job as Bard of Barnsley
to vex them in their habit.

Wean them off The Sunday Sport
lead them to the library
I challenge you
Bard of Barnsley
to make one Luddite
fall in love with Keats.

Ian McMillan is “The Bard of Barnsley” personally I think he called this because it rhymes. They could have called him the Chaucer of Cudworth or the Keats of Kendray, or The Hughes of Hoyland. The people bestowed upon him one of the most limiting titles ever created. He must be crying on the inside as his poems are far more challenging than mine.

I want to be remembered as “The Plath of Wath” which is another small village on the outskirts of Barnsley.

I await the lawsuit that is sure to follow this post.

© Copyright D. Archer October 2011